Change of plans.
Coffee pots on.
Winamps running.
Prepare to be Bloganated.
Hrmmm Termiblogged... Bloginated... Yer. That's it.
Change that to 'Prepare to be Bloginated'.
INCOMING! Get down and think small thoughts! And hope the other guys got a bigger ass...

Through the Christmas Ornament...
Whoo... Feels kinda good to be typing... Mosta my time has beens pent in EQ lately. Except the last 2 nights where I have failed to ding twice... Not good. Didn't even get on tonight. Will tommorrow night and mosta Thursday. Got a semi Job interview Thursday... Anywya, onto the list of things to do and what not...

Wow.. I'm scrolling back through old logs to find my Blog format, because I can't remember it... And... Geez... It's beena long tiem sicne my last, BIG blog, huh? Yeesh.. Sorry folks...

HOLY! I can't even find my last big Blog in teh archives.. Scary...

Christmas Wish List - A ho ho Whole lotta stuff.
Pantomime - With Christmas comes cheer, goodwill towards man and small children. This had all of that plus loads of pain.
Fashion Patrol - I'm under lock and Cashmeer
BGA - Bloomin' anew or the tortured dream of a Madman?
Xcel gaming - Myth or fact? Step into the lair of the Baggy... There's no way to say that omniously...
Windows Xp - Older, dumber, more processor Dependant!
Fear the Penguin - Be one with the penguin... Unless you use ATA 100...
Driving you Crazy - With great power, comes great abuse of said power.
Top 2 Countdown - The best and worst of the Street speakers chart.
Obscure Blog references - Poem? WTF does that mean...? I need a secretary or a PDA...
Harry Potter - Cup o' tea, Guvner?
Online Gaming - Coming of age and taking it like a cheap wench... So I've been told... o.o
D2AT - The future is here! Coming soon...
Lord of the Rings - Fellowship of a legend no movie could ever capture...?
Christmas recipes for you! - What I did for Christmas and why you shouldn't try it.
Reload - Pass the ammo, Henry!
Where for art thou... Um.. You know.. - That guy.. With the face.. And hair? I think he had eyes...
Anime Corner - The clsoest most Nerds will come to actually touching a large breasted woman... And dang, do we mean LARGE...
Job Offer - My future, my potential future and how to use Hamsters in cooking.

Wow.. That's quite the list. Let's move some ass!
*Shake shake*
Heh.. Sorry...
Onward, upward! Outta fuel! Cruuuuuuuu-*

He's making a list, checking it twice... - Christmas Wish list
+A cape
+The ability to fly
+The ability to shoot lasers outta my frickin' eyes
+Violent Videogames
+Violent weapons of mass destruction
+Violent weapons of minor destruction
+X Ray vision - To find winning lotto tickets ya pervs.
+Nanobots - Nuff' said.
+The ability to go without sleep - Tafe assignments
+A computer upgrade - Yes, it runs. But does it RUN...?

I don't mind doubles. I can return them or give themt o someone, so make sure you include receipts so I know how cheap you are...

They love me, they really love me! And it scares me... - Pantomime
Well, as a few of you may be vaguely aware, I was recently in a Pantomime.
WTF is that I hear you abbreviate in various forms fo 1337 hax0r. Well, it's like a play with very little respect for the 4th wall, paying it's actors, or accomplishing anything beyond mirth...

Pantomime's don't have big life stories... They have guys in drag, women as men and cheap audience participation stunts.
And of this all, I was king...
I played a character called, well, Buttons...
I am already impervious to the mocking thanks to a few people who claim to care about me constantly bombarding me with it... Yet I still fear it's name, the implications fo releasing such knowledge upon your frail and inn-... Sorry, wrong audience.. Your frail and caffeinated minds.

So, who the heck is buttons, and what's he doing in Cinderella?
Well.. IT's a pantomime, they.. Twist things. Like a Licorice twist made of caramel flavoured milk.
Well, according to our rendition, Buttons is the faithful servant/friend/wanna be boyfriend of Cinderella.
As it would happen, I have rpetty much the biggest part in the whole freakin' play. And I still don't get the girl.. Probably ebst, I was sweatin' liek a pig on stage...

The audiences loved me though. I mean REALLY loved me. I had little kids falling for me left right and center.
If I was a paedophile, I would of been happy. As is, it was scary.. Very VERY scary... I mean, you play along to keep the kids happy. IT's part of the character. But when they start biting you and patting your butt, it's just.. Creepy. Buffy is actually a transvestite midget creepy. And yes, that actually happened...

So, in the end, I earned myself a townwide reputation as a legendary actor and a legion of addoring fans. They will be my legions of doom, yes...

We have the money! We have the technology! We cna make him Older, more mature, less geeky! - fashion Patrol
Big sister over from Sydney. Staying with us. No problem.
Or is it?

She's always been the preferred brand name. Sister X is just a wench who don't eat meat and needs to take a freakin' chill pill... Or.. Somethin'...
Jenny bad, Carolyn good.
But lately, Caroly has been irritating too.
Not Jenny irritating. Oh no. That'd be scary.
Irritating in her own way.
Big sisterly lectures.
Bunches of them too, she can get real.. Uppity...

And worst of all.. Every time she's over she tries to funkify me. No problem. I kinda like lookin' a little better than I normally do. But... Well...
You can only go so far. I mean, trying to force me to wear CLEAN clothes? Has she no mercy????
Matching socks?
If I wanted this kidna lecturing I wouldn't hate Jill.
"You have to wear matching socks!"
Why, what kinda freak is gonna eb staring at my feet going 'You're not wearing matching foot apparel!!'
...
Oi...
Only things that should be looking at my socks are Bugs in my shoes. And I don't care what they think, they're either about to eb dead, or are about to kill me.
Either way, not a lot of caring...

They seek it high, they seek it low.. But where will all the Gamers go? - BGA
Busselton Gamers Association..
It seems liek a dark, dim memory...
I didn't put that much effort in, that's true.. Maybe none of su did...
But that thing is falling apart like a lump of poop dropping into our atmosphere...
A long time ago now, BGA before last I believe... My intanglement with the BGA ended.
I was there for the founding, helping to make it possible.. It feels almost like a peice of me died when I left..
Nah, just indigestion.

In my very public opinon, BGA is going to heck.
It's being controlled by a bunch of petty, childish gamers. Whoever whines the loudest seems to get the attention. It's the best organsied Lan in Busselton, but then again.. It's the only organised LAN in Busselton.
I won't go into too many details, but basically, at the last BGA I attended, well... It was sad. Disorganised, constant whining, people (Including myself) Abusing server power. Theft. Admins changing prizes because they didn't like who won.
BGA is the dark face of Busselton gamers.
I had been contemplating it for awhile, but that was it. The last straw, the final... Thing... I decided to disavow any knowledge of the BGA or it's innermost, tarnished workings...

So, after a week or so, I finally got around to speaking one of the.. 2? 3? remaining admins, Omad. Letting him know I was not gonna attend or act in an Admin capacity.
Boom.
He replied with, if memory serves, "It was my understanding that you weren't going to be an Admin anymore. Wether you attend is upto you."
Bam...
I was fired while I quit...
This puts one in an interesting predicament... Or whatever.
I mean, most people I know and value the opinion of have dropped out of attending already...
But sitll, being fired when you're quitting.. It has a strange.. Sting to it... A dissatysfyingly snail tasting flavour... Not unlike raspberry and pepper Fanta... Hope that enver goes public.
I was a Vagrant by choice, by action and by circumstance...

I mena.. It's not that I wish the BGA harm. I wish they could pull it together and turn it into a decent LAN, but I just don't see that happening..
So for now, I'll attend Reloads, and maybe the occasional Bunno LAN I'm invited to.

History keeps on walking...

It's new, it's different and it's cool! - Xcel Gaming
XCel gaming isn't real/ It's not the name fo anything I'ma ware of, but it woulda made an even ebtter rumor...
At the last SWGN, which may well be the final one, I asked Baggy a question.
A simple question based upon the hypothesis of a potential rumor I had heard.
Well, really it was just a Rumor.
Baggy was going to make a LAN. Make it good. Make it hard. Make it have cool cars in cans for prizes. Maybe make me and Viro admin.
So, I asked him.
And I discovered wiht a mixture of horror and expectant doubt, that their was no LAN. No such diea had ever been mentioned. Somehow, amongst the bows of Busselton, the Busso Lanners had turned into gossip mongering bitches, and like chumps, we'd all been bugging Baggy about a LAN that never was...
It was.. Interesting.

But Baggy, if you read this, and you do make a LAN, call it Xcell Gaming just to make me look even more psychic than norma, Okay?

If it was a dog, you would shoot it. Twice. - Windows XP
I'm not saying Windows XP is bad. But is it good?

IT's based off Win 2K... Increased stability. Mmmm...
But like any true gamer, I still have my share of crashes, maybe more than my share...
It's got some handy new features.
Defragger sitll blows Bill's Floppy drive...
Can't fix your drive, but will take 8 bloody hours to figure that out...
But really, it's just Win 98 with a Task Manager, some stability upping, log on screens, anda new look some people just LOATHE...

But it'll do... For now...

I am the Walrus, Coo coo cachoo - Fear the Penguin
Well, it's late.. Real late.. 2 in the morning, and I'm sitll not half way through my list of Things to Blog. So I'll make this short.

Linux is cool.
Anyone who says otherwise is a babbling fool.
I really need to learn to use it some time...
And get a computer running that it won't hate...

L plates? HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA*Wheez, deep breath*HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA - Driving you Crazy
No, I'm not talking about the lack of strippage on D2AT.
I'm talking about the laws of man and God, and the double white lines I wa snever meant to cross.
I am now a legal driver.
I can no longer claim the childs head was obscured by a P plate... Shame...
What does this mean?
Satisfaction, excitement and a little dissapointment.

Satisfied and Excited? I can drive 110! No more putting up and taking down of P plates...
And yet...
I'm no longer part of THEM.
They.. The ones who are P...
I cna no longer look at a car load of teenage girls witha P plate up and expect them to pick out my P plate amongst the crowd of uncluttered windows and inspect me for possible satisfaction of their computer Nerd secret fantasies.
I'm just another dirty windshield on the road...
A bloodied bug speck upon their vision...
I made that P plate, and yet, it amde me.. Without it, I feel as though I am forsaken, broken apart amongst a thousand shards, unforged in cold, dark waters...

But I can get where I'm goign quicker than a P plater... Most of the time.. Till about Febuary... =\
I suppose that shall have to suffice. For in palce of my P plated heart now beats merely an odometre...

Gaaaaaaaay... -Top 2 Countdown
Ok, so I'm walking past the shopping cnter, right?
And they have these speakers, right?
Little discoloured discs of off white plastic that spit out scrambeled, raspy sounds.
they musta been installed in the 80's or something.
It's playing Mundaneshoppingradiostation.
Nothing Big.
Now at tiems, I have heard the soothign beats of Creed or Nickleback drift from this suppository of low decibel, tinny, bass-less music.
But upon this particular walk, my ears were assailed by the tune of a song most dark. Draped in gloriously dark, arcane traditiona nd dripping with the blood of my ear drums.
Rudolph the rednose reindeer...
It was if I had awoken froma shattered dream, only to have the fractured pieces stabbed into my mind, inducing a nightmare of mind numbing evil... Of women over 80 naked, rubbing wrinkles... *Shudder
This song is more than my nemesis... More than a symbol of hateful happiness... It is the anti-me. The Negajoy...
And on this podium of ill begotten fame and attention, I proclaim today, any found to eb harbouring this song upon their HD will be forced to endure suffering unlike any other. They will be forced to.. Dare I incant such a dark reckoning, even upon the lost souls of Rudolph lovers? YES! I MAY!
YOU WILL BE FORCED TO WATCH THE TWEENIES UNTIL YOUR EYES BLEED TEARS!!

Those who will test this will suffer an eternity of head puppetry and bad child puns... And bright, HAPPY colours...

Whozamawhatzitthingamajigga - Obscure Blog References
Well, as you can all guess, witht he length of time between Blogs, I accumulate information to feed to your hungry maws of minds.
Some of that information I micro Blog to myself.
Some of it I leave scattered across books and desktops.
But mostly these days, I plant it all in a single file with a small note.
But not all is as clear as it seems.

I'm scrolling down my list of things, and I find it.
That one, blindingly alone word... that epitome of obscurity...
Poem
That's it. Not even a full stop for finality. Just that one burning, forsaken word...
Poem
I can only assume it means I wrote a Poem I wish to share,a s I have not done so in some time... For this purpose, I will take a moment to search for this forgotten nugget of universal truth and miss-rhyme.
Be patient.

Dang... N oluck.
Can't find head nor toe of the little bugger... If it ever existed.. *sigh*
Hrmmm...
Oh well. If I get popular demand, or hell, any demand... Then you'll be regaled wiht petry in a future issue. If not.. Eh...

Oooh, look at me, I can get splinters in my crotch. - Harry Potter
Well.. Harry Potter.
What can I say.
Plenty, but time marches ever onward, so I must be brief till I get my Time Machine I bought on eBay.
I wanted to go see it.
Elise did not.
Somehow I blackmailed her into it.
She invited Kirsty along without my consent, but hey, why should Icare if my Girlfriend treats me as a Taxi service...
Somehow blackmailed her into going in with an open mind.
Lined up expectantly. Went. Watched for the whole, damn long movie.
Left.

Did it change me? No, ya Moggle... (Doc, I'll explain that one later.)
Did I enjoy it?
Yes and no...
A movie ahs to eb somethign special to really touch me.
Sometimes Ineed to watch it a bunch. Sometimes it jsut happens. I expected Harry to be one such movie.
It failed.
I could teel it was a good movie, it just didn't.. touch me.. YA know? Like that pervert crossing guard when you were a kid? It didn't achieve that...
Still, worth the ticket price. Especially if you do Money over time in theatre...
Oh, and Elise LOVED it... Now her secret is out.

And to all you close minded little bastards who refuse to see it on principal... Grow UP! Yeesh. It may not be the best movie you've ever seen, and it may be aimed more at fans and kids.. But, I mean.. Look at the Phantom Menace. It's time to wake up and smell the Jar Jar. EVERYTHING is about the kids and merchandise these days. This movie at least has a baddy who disintegrates... Heh...

I'll be on vacation Brent, not DEAD. - Online Gaming
Well.. I've rendered my resignation in Utopia. The game was good, but I'm hte last person I know who plays,a nd it jsut takes too much to be good at it.
Imperial Conflict was very promising, but after it went down FOREVER... I doubt I will play that any longer either.

I have moved forward by taking a step back.
Sometiems old lovers are the most comfortable friends and the ebst chance for love once more.
You know them, yet they change with age...
I declare it now. I declare it loud. And I declare it without guilt.
I am an Evercrack addict.
Everquest to the amsses.
It is more than a Game.
It is more than online.
It is a Dicator ship.
A bastion of nerfing and ultra ultra ultra rare drops.
It holds the fortitue of a thousand screams in the swirling vortex of a single Friends list.
It is my affliction.
And at level 31 I will gladly see you all twinked out if you join and worship me mercilessly as the slayer of 30+ mobs...
Fear the Hell levels, for with them comes sleep deprivation.

If it's online, it has to eb funny.. Right? - D2AT
Well.. IT's here.. Almost.. Sort of.. Approaching rapidly and without precident.. And I sitll never find tiema dn inspiration enough to finish off the first strip. But my drawing style is stabilising.
It is a fusion of lack of talent with copy cat styles...
Fortunately, the script is crazy ass weird and amusing.
And we already have a Fan, sort of.. Doc...
He's pleading for the first episode already.. Sort of.
So to you, Doc, I dedicate this link.
The first of many with luck. It is D2AT, Viro style...
Fear the Web Monkey

Where the feck is Tom Bombadil??? - Lord of the Rings
Short.
Sweet.
Bittersweet.

Good, but it didn't grope me and take me for it's bitch like I expected...
It fell.. Short... Hobbit short.. Pale imitation of AD&D with altered names to make them seem like original character concepts short... I never finished the first damn book short...
It missused Special effects, dramatic over bearing, forshadowing and blurry camera angles.
But for all who would call themselves NErds, it is still needed viewing...

Why I shot Santa.. - Christmas Recipes for You
Well, actually, my Christmas wasn't too bad. Passable. Acceptable.
Jill traveled to Perth for Christmas.
First stroke of good luck. No jumping between houses. No SEEING that damnable despoiler of child like illusions...
Happy times.
Present side, I made out kinda light. But not bad. Buffy Season 3 on DVD and some other stuff. Waiting on a signed comic.
Carolyn and Ryan was over.
I was Grandmaster of the Remote Contorl race Courses we set up 2 times running, and almost a third. Damn brother beat me by less than a second...

And perhaps coolest of all, my Dad gave me gold.
Real gold. Heavy gold. Bite it kinda gold.
See, being the man he is, he collects pretty things. Bows. Small children according to some of Jills rumors. Gold coins. Stamps. Rifles. Hand guns. Swords.
He decided that holding onto the gold coins was pointless, so he divied them out amongst us kids.
I got a few hunder dollars worth.
They're mint condition, and for now, shall remain in waiting till the day they're worht LOTS to coin collectors and I can retire on them.
Or I decide I need a GeForce 4 to live...

Riddle me this, Riddle me that... Who's afraid of the big Bad Bat? - Where for art thou... Um... You know...
Ok, so it wasn't Jim Carreys finest moment.
Ok. Basically, I've been running out of quotes for a while now. Scraping together waht I cna... Feel free to send em any good ones. But from now on, I'm just gonna make them up. For humor or whatever.
I may make them sound like something a character would say, maybe not...
You will see.
If I wasn't so lazy I might even start a voting poll to vote on wether ti's a real quote or not. But I am so I won't.

I won't run away! I won't run away! But I won't do anything but sit here and whine!! - Anime Corner
Yer, I know this Blog has been somewhat sexist and crude.
Eh.
I'm tired. Lemme alone.
I'm sure Elise will make me suffer.

So, what's good and what's not.

Well.. Let's see. The final episode of Evangelion and the movie about teh whole.. Final episode thing.. Blows.
It makes no sense.
Some of it's rpetty animations.
Some of it's just gorey and weird. I smoked crack and had a nightmare weird.
Most of it's jsut plain weird/stupid...
They need a 5 minute walk through every 10 minutes to explain it all...
Oh well.
Good seires, tarnished by the ending...

Martian Succesor Nadesico. Now this was a cool/weird series.
It ain't FLCL weird or cool, but ti's a lot longer, ands till weird.
Definetly worth a rental fee. Even an overdue rental fee... Heh...

Dragonball Z. As always, chopsie. Just when you're gettng into a battle or soemthing,a character will make some HUGE Feckin' screw up that will just piss you off.. A plot hole that a whole planet can vanish through... Or refuse to vanish through.
But sitll, it is a classic. One of the all tiem big ones. Despite all the annoyances, like Gohan and Goten, who are VERY annoying... it's addictive.

FLCL. Smoke cracka nd watch this, it will seem perfectly noraml. Watch it straight, and you'll wish you were smoking something. Nothing we know or understand exists the same in this show, even episode to episode at times. But.. It undeniable rocks. The final episode is bitterly sweet short, with the power, potential and obligation of incredible, freakish awesome Mecha/super human combat riding it all the way home... A must see for any true Anime fan... Or anyone who wishes to be scared into being an anime fan.
Like Carrot cake soup...

Finally, Trigun. Damn... I hunger for this series. The first 4 episodes are good, but they only really set the stage for the later episodes...
In the later episodes, we are exposed to true brillance.. A compelling, continuining story line... Beautiful character design.. Strange humor.. Incredible fight scenes. If you can, watch this series. If you can't, find someone who can, club them to deatha dn take it form them.
But not me, I haven't got the whole series yet.

Cut your own ang hair! - Job Offer
Wow... Almost 3:15... Almsot done. I'll keep it fairly brief.
Basically, I've applied for IT diploma.
Been refused...
Bitterly refused.
It was unexpected... So, within the next day ros o they will post out second offers.
If I'm not offered a palce then, I will be a vagrant on the educational stream of thought.
I intend to teach myself Half life code/C++/to draw we comics on time every tiem if I don't get in.
And another possibility looms.
reguardless of wether I get in, I may soon be pursuing a job at Harvey Normans.
Yes, I know they're big and evil, but hey...
I'd get paid well, get to borrow the Gamecube/X-Box tester units (In theory/hope) and eb able to upgrade my computer.
It's all yet to eb decided. Baggy's trying to form a job of some description for me.. Probably as the poor pleb he sends to fetch things from the cellar of doom... I'm supposed to go in Thursday.
Not for an interview, just to smooze... Meet the boss.
Have to look nice.
Human nice.
Have to act it too...
Gonna be interesting.

We'll see where the pebbles fall...

Finale
Well.. That's it.
I'm all Blogged out.
Thanks for reading it. Hope it was entertaining. More entertaining than playing rugby with a Sheeps Bladder at least...

...

Boom, Baby.
--Kiljoy the Cranberry drinker
"Love & Peace!" - Vash the Stampede, Trigun
posted by Unknown at 1/22/2002 11:18:00 AM [edit]